greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

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$lmjimy311
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greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by $lmjimy311 »

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/200 ... field.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

F–k It. I’m Throwing It Downfield.

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Is that Berrian? I think he’s triple-covered. You know what? Fuck it. I’m throwing it downfield.

Yeah, I see Jones open on the flank. But fuck that. Dumpoff passes are for faggots. I’m fucking Sexy Rexy Grossman. I can get that ball in there. And, even if I can’t, I bet I’ll be able to pull it off the next go round. I like throwing the ball long. It makes my dick hard.

What’s that? I should throw a quick slant? Fuck that. That’s gay. Button hook? Gay. Flare out? Gay. Screen pass? Kevin Spacey gay. This is fucking football. You can’t just expect wins to come to you. You can’t massage that shit. You gotta grab that game by the throat and rape the ever-loving shit out of it. You think a 5-yard out is gonna win you a game? You’re a pussy. This ain’t John Shoop running this offense. Sexy Rexy’s got the arm. The dragon. You gotta unleash the dragon.

Okay, I’m throwing it. Nice. Look how far it went. I look good. I bet I made that Pats cheerleader wet her panties with that throw. She fucking wants me. I bet she likes it over a stair railing. I can hit that with 100% accuracy, my dear. Mmmmmm. I am delicious.

Oh shit. Looks like Samuel caught it. Again. Oh well. It still felt fucking great to throw that shit. Tell me that wasn’t one of the prettiest passes you ever saw. You know what? Not only am I gonna throw it long the next time we hit the field. I’m gonna throw it even longer. Harder. You see that kid in wheelchair sitting in the end zone bleachers? I’m gonna nail him right between the fucking eyes with a Sexy Rexy fastball. Why? Because I can.

This is Rex Grossman we’re talking about here. We’re talking 210 lbs. of twisted steel and sex appeal. I’m not just a gunslinger. I’m a cumslinger. Throwing that ball long tells all the Rexettes that I am fucking out there. On the edge. Where I gotta be. The ladies love the danger. The unpredictability. Oh, maybe I’ll tease them with a pretty touch pass every now and again. But then I’m gonna go right back to pumping that ball out for all it’s worth. It tells them I throw like I fuck. That’s how we do things in the sexy business.

Tell me you’re not turned on right now. I am.
Last edited by $lmjimy311 on Mon Sep 14, 2009 10:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by KyleRayner »

yeah i can't make pictures work anymore, either

but that was hilarious
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$lmjimy311
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by $lmjimy311 »

bump for rex grossman's latest quote

"We don't need people saying we're the best right now, but when it's all said and done, I really feel like this team's gonna win the East."

http://espn.go.com/new-york/nfl/story/_ ... n-nfc-east" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by logosteel »

$lmjimy311 wrote:bump for rex grossman's latest quote

"We don't need people saying we're the best right now, but when it's all said and done, I really feel like this team's gonna win the East."

http://espn.go.com/new-york/nfl/story/_ ... n-nfc-east" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
I honestly love his cockyness.
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by Element »

i honestly loved smashing quarterbacks. they're all assholes.
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CatCity
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Post by CatCity »

Element wrote:i honestly loved smashing quarterbacks. they're all assholes.

like your ass was fast enough to catch a QB you big ass pizza slice eatin motherfucker
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by Element »

Bitch please I smashed qbs all fucking game from the 1 and 3 technique, jelly?
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Jeffhaswhatyouwant
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by Jeffhaswhatyouwant »

Element wrote:Bitch please I smashed qbs all fucking game from the 1 and 3 technique, jelly?

same bullshit, stop lying.
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by Element »

Image

here is a pic of me pancaking some poor bastard, unfortunately this is the only copy of it i have, and it's tiny. :(
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by CatCity »

Element wrote:Image

here is a pic of me pancaking some poor bastard, unfortunately this is the only copy of it i have, and it's tiny. :(

LOL
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by Element »

impressed?

you should be
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by KyleRayner »

he's starting sunday :bounce: :shock: :roll: :mrgreen:
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$lmjimy311
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by $lmjimy311 »

im excited thats for damn sure
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by JuicyJ »

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!!!


7-9 or 8-8 at best
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Re: greatest football article ever THE LEGEND OF SEXY REXY

Post by logosteel »

JuicyJ wrote:HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!!!

HAIL is right....Now will he sit sex cannon for Beckgruber against the reeling Eagles?

I hope not as I am going to that bitch.
JuicyJ wrote:7-9 or 8-8 at best
Said this at the beginning of the season.
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